When I ask clients what it is that they want I am often met with a deafening silence. However, when I ask them what they DO NOT want, it suddenly becomes difficult to get them stop talking! They don’t want bad employees, they don’t want to be overweight, they don’t want to worry about money or retirement, they don’t want to work long hours and they don’t want an empty or vacant marriage! The list goes on and on. Guess what? What you focus on truly expands. That’s why I encourage clients to focus on what they WANT and not on WHAT THEY DON’T WANT!
Here are three simple ways you can focus on the positive and minimize the negative in your life:
Observe Your Thoughts
Simply notice what you are thinking and ask “does this thought serve and help me or does this hinder and hurt me?” We are often unaware of how negative or self defeating our thoughts may be due to our thinking patterns being so ingrained. Others around us are aware of our thoughts because those thoughts become our actions. Not aware of what you are thinking? Ask your trusted advisors and associates to provide candid and honest feedback about your actions.
Keep the Good Thoughts and Lose the Bad Ones
This is easier said than done. Changing our thought process is one of the hardest things we ever do. However, if the pain is deep enough we CAN and WILL do it. It can be as easy as repeating a positive phrase that you firmly believe in to yourself. I know for me writing daily in my journal often helps that ‘stinking thinking’ to transition to a lighter, happier place. Having someone to support you in healthier thinking can be valuable. The point is – try something that allows you to change the bad thoughts and keep the good ones is essential to your well-being.
So much of our life becomes a habit that it’s no surprise the same happens with our thoughts. We simply think the same thought over and over and many times get stuck in a rut. Anything you can do to change that routine will make a big difference. Taking a walk, listening to music, getting a manicure or playing golf or ping pong can take your head to another place.
Your thoughts are powerful and shape your life on a daily basis. You create your thoughts and your thoughts create your life- so change your thoughts and change your results!